The repetitious statistic, “You know, they say the citizens of third world countries are happier than the people living in industrialized, modern countries, like the U.S. A.,” is floating around marketplaces and coffeehouses in full force, and has been for some time. Is this true? Aside from questions like, “What do you mean by happier?” there does seem to be a lot of misery and consternation in the post-modern world, despite modern technology and scientific and medical advances. The search for meaning and happiness is rampant. Notice the number of self-help books in bookstores, or the rise of Buddhism, yoga, meditation, and stress-reducing exercises in Western society. Humans build gods, civilizations, cities, problems, and then destroy them. What if the modern world collectively jumped back into antiquity, back into the good old days, before technology and modernism? Before everything was too easy? Could we then, as humans, be happy?
Here are 5 steps on how to be happy again and regain meaning in your life. You may be unpopular with the modern world, at first, if you follow these steps, but happiness and meaning will at least be yours to enjoy, and most likely the others will follow suit in the near future anyway.
You’ve thrown away all of your modern material goods, including money, and now you are left to survive. Find an area to build a makeshift shelter. This activity will recall the struggles of prehistoric man and obviously take up a lot of your time, leaving you with the sense of a good day’s work. Building a shelter is completely necessary, meaning that you’ll feel your work was essential to your being, and you will not question if your time was well spent, because it was.
If you have a spouse, let that spouse help you build your shelter. This will be good bonding. You will need materials, like twigs, branches, vines or bark, and whatever else you can thriftily throw together. Do not build your shelter too well, however, as the land you are building on is probably not yours, and the cruel, unhappy modernists will throw you off the land, leaving you to roam around for another place to build a new shelter. This is good, as the importance and maintenance of your physical being will always be in question, instilling meaning in your life, which will lead to happiness.
2) Weapons & Tools (including Fire)
You will need an assortment of tools and weapons. If you’re wandering around the countryside, as you should be, you’ll have to make new tools with every move. Get a good piece of metal, even if you have to steal it from somewhere (but make sure it is rusty and old, so it doesn’t look too modern), and learn to chisel rocks and sharpen wood to make on-site tools. Also, learning to make fire with flint rock and kindling is essential for obvious reasons such as heat, cooking, and tempering tools. With tools and weapons, you will raise yourself two notches in the prehistoric man’s book and a whole array of new, meaningful options will fall into your life.
Food is most essential, because without food, you will have no energy to build shelter or craft tools. So, eat what you can until you have sharp sticks or weapons with which to hunt. Once you can hunt, you can elevate from eating berries and foliage to eating animal protein. Food will be a constant source of anxiety for you, which is good as this struggle will bring meaning and happiness to your life.
4) Pillage & Plunder Surrounding Townships
Another use for your weapons is to raid and pillage surrounding towns and villages for food, tools, local females, and excitement. Even the prehistoric man needs a little entertainment, so violent raiding and plundering will provide a small facet for that need.
Gather the men folk who have also decided to make the jump into prehistoric man’s happy living, and hide in the bushes around a surrounding town, waiting until the lights are out before you run, whooping and hollering, weapons raised above head, to murder the men and rape the women. At first, this aspect of prehistoric man seems gritty, if not a little over the top, but with time, it will become commonplace; an event worth looking forward to.
The danger of attacking and being attacked will insert a definite sense of mortality in your head, and this will make everything you do more meaningful, and happiness will blossom out of that.
5) Saturday Night O rgy
As marriage is a social construction and a way to be affluent and spend money, the custom needs to die. You may have a special someone who runs through the countryside with you, but you will have no legal papers binding you, nor do you wear rings. You are, more or less, a human animal, attached to no other animal. Like step #4, Saturday Night Or gy is a group activity that can bring people together. An org y is used to improve relations, dabble with other human animals and, of course, to propagate the human species. Or gies should be attempted monthly, if not weekly. For proper enjoyment, hold the activity in a dirty field underneath a bright moon.
The org y is another facet for entertainment, and though some of it may seem superfluous and overindulgent, just remember the practical task of keeping the human race alive, and remember how relentlessly pursued that goal must be.
As mentioned above, transitioning into being a prehistoric man isn’t easy, and will not be welcomed by the rest of society, but in the end, it will prove fruitful and you’ll be able to feel whole once again. And more and more, as you live this prehistoric lifestyle, you’ll say to yourself, while building yet another shelter, or finally eating after two days of unsuccessful hunting, “Ah, now that’s the meaning of life.”