While writers struggle to produce their first book, 9-year-old Alec Gravin has found success with a dating book. Many people find dating confusing and complicated at any age, but Gravin’s simple view point makes dating seem simple. Even though Gravin claims he’s far too young to date, thousands of people are purchasing his book “How To Talk To Girls” for his wisdom.
The book began as an elementary school project. Gravin observed playground school mates. By studying how boys interacted and often failed with their female counterparts, he was able to provide some very no-nonsense advice. But how can a 9-year-old possibly understand the complexities of talking to women? Apparently, it’s not difficult if you simply understand what girls like.
Gravin’s book is now a New York Times best-seller. Bachelors and even happily taken men are rushing out to read Gravin’s advice. With Gravin’s simple approach, men could learn a lot about how exactly to talk to a woman. Most of what Gravin says is common sense, but is so simple that most people never actually think about it. That is where mistakes often occur during those initial conversations.
According to BBC Newsbeat, Gravin believes men should find a cool role model upon which to base their behavior. Men can learn a lot by simply observing those that are successful with women. This includes those playing the field and those currently in relationships. Either way, these men have obviously found success in dating and have something to teach others.
At such a young age, Gravin has already learned that the prettiest girls aren’t always the best choice. Gravin advises men to talk to average girls since they are usually nicer. This is something many men have trouble getting past. Looks aren’t everything. If you can’t have a good conversation, then you’re not going to have any hopes of a good or lasting relationship. He doesn’t suggest that men avoid pretty girls altogether, but believes that all women deserve attention.
In an interview on Newsbeat Radio, Gravin’s skills were put to the test with 22-year-old Kristina Sorge. According the Newsbeat, he began the conversation strongly with talk about recent movies. The conversation dwindled afterwards, but Gravin insists that if they were closer in age, he could use the conversation about movies to suggest a date to a movie they would both enjoy.
Gravin’s most important advice to men is to simply listen to what a woman has to say. By mainly listening, you don’t have the chance to mess up the conversation. This is very good advice indeed. Women naturally love to talk, not only about themselves, but their friends, the latest gossip, and anything else they find interesting. Men should also have their input, but Gravin believes being a good listener is the key to successfully talking to women.
In case the relationship doesn’t pan out, Gravin also offers advice on breaking up and moving on. In his Newsbeat interview, Gravin stated that you should explain that the relationship isn’t going to work out and offer to be friends. You should also move on instead of dwelling on the break up. This mistake is quite common. If a 9-year-old can see that moving on is best, shouldn’t we all be able to put the past behind us?
Alec Gravin is from Colorado and is currently working on several follow ups to his successful “How to Talk to Girls”. According to Newsbeat, titles include “How to Talk to Moms”, “How to Talk to Dads”, and “How to Talk to Grandparents”. Sometimes advice from a child’s perspective is the most clear and should be listened to.
The interview can be found at BBC Newsbeat.