T-shirt Hell is one of those companies that has really pushed people’s buttons over the years, at one point even angering someone enough to poison its creator. The tshirthell.com website offers a wide range of T-shirts that target specific groups, like women, blacks, and Christians, and they’re trying to get under everyone’s skin again with a very special Black People Friday offer.
Through Sunday, November 30, 2008, T-shirt hell customers can get a great deal on their Christmas gifts for people who are brave enough (or stupid enough) to actually wear the T-shirts from the site in public. All they have to do is type in the code IMBLACK when checking out to receive 30 percent off their purchases. But the email I received says that Jews and anyone else looking for a bargain need not apply; this offer is for the new “ruling class” only (implying black people are the new ruling class with Barack Obama as President). When you check out, you have to type in a few comments to prove that you really are a black person (I can’t even imagine the racist remarks people will be using to try to get the discount).
Obviously the site can’t really decipher who is a black customer and who is a white customer just from a few sentences typed in the comment box, so it’s likely everyone using the code will get the discount, or they’ll just give it to whomever they feel like. It’s an outrageous ploy to sell T-shirts, but it’ll probably work (white people will try it just to see if they can pass for being black with their comments).
So use the code to buy everyone on your list T-shirt Hell Christmas gifts that really make statements. Here are a few examples of the T-shirts you can choose from:
Men who wear sandals get what they deserve (with a picture of Jesus hanging on a cross)
I fu**ed Sarah Palin (by voting for Barack Obama)
Anti-Christ ’08 (with picture of Barack Obama)
Slavery gets sh*t done (with picture of pyramids)
Dear Lord thank you for this p*ssy for which I am about to receive (with picture of praying hands)
Coma Sutra (with picture of man having sex with someone in a coma in various positions)
Don’t mess with Texas (It’s not nice to pick on retards)
All daddy wanted was a blow job (shirt for a baby)
How dare I wear this Goddamn shirt in front of your f**king kids
So if you know people who enjoy pissing everyone off, you may want to check the site out and pretend that you’re black to buy them a good chance at getting the sh*t kicked out of them by a redneck for a little bit cheaper. After all, nothing says Merry Christmas like a T-shirt with a picture of Jesus, long hair blowing in the wind, wearing an open leather jacket and nothing underneath, with the words, “Gay Jesus offends Christians.”