Emotional intelligence is just as important as IQ because it implies a child’s character when it comes to social function, the way his mind would think or decide with regards to his relation with other people. Many adults can’t help being over-protective of their kids, especially at an early age. Some may even go to the extent of spoiling them which usually causes problem in the years to come. Here are some pointers on how to help your child develop his emotional maturity at a young age.
1. Don’t spank or scold people or things that unintentionally or accidentally caused the child to have a very slight upsetting experience that made him cry. Children usually cry whenever they feel upset even with slight or minor accidents because it’s their fastest way to communicate their feelings when experiencing pain or hurt. An instance is when a child gets bumped by another child unintentionally and he falls down on his knees to the floor and then he cries for help. Some parents would right away scold the other individual and even the floor that caused the pain. This should not be, otherwise the child would grow up bearing in his mind that nobody or nothing should stand in his way. He will also have the notion that is is but natural to get back at people or even things that has made him feel upset or hurt. Therefore, it is better to explain to the child that it wasn’t intentional and ask the other child or person to apologize and that’s it. When the child falls down on the floor, encourage him to stand up on his own but be near him with your arms reaching out to assure him that you are there to help him stand up. This will develop in him a sense of courage to overcome obstacles by himself which would definitely be very useful when he meets the real world in his later years.
2. When a child is trying to do things by himself or for himself, don’t interfere unless things need to get done right away. Let the child exercise his mind to find out for himself how to do things on his own like putting on his clothes or feeding himself. A child will always learn to find out how to do things in the easiest way for him. This will establish self-confidence and independence at an early age. But definitely, you have to watch the child for guidance and safety.
3. When a child offers help at home, never refuse unless the task is urgent or dangerous or concerning business matters. Even if the child will not be able to do the chore as an adult would, still let him help. It doesn’t matter even if it seems he’s just playing as long as he is willing to do the chore to help you. Everybody wants to be appreciated for his thoughtfulness and sweetness and acceptance is the best way to show appreciation. An example is when a child wants to help washing the dishes. You can allow him to stand on a chair beside you while you wash the dishes. You can allow your child to assist you or you can allow him to soap the very light plastic wares. Let the child enjoy helping in the household chores as much as possible. This will make the child learn to accept his own duty at home and in the community as he grows up, developing in him a sense of responsibility.
4. When a child offers to give you something out of generosity, accept it. Don’t give it back even if you don’t like it or you don’t need it at all. On the other hand, when the child gives everything to you, don’t take it all. Tell him that he has to keep some for himself so he learns to value himself as well. Of course, don’t forget to thank the child for what he has given to you. But do encourage the child to share toys and snacks with other people, yound and old. If you happen to do charity visits, let the child come with you if the place is not health-threatening to a child. Let him know the virtue of caring for the weak and the needy.
5. Read books and provide educational toys for the child which you can share during quality moments. Let the child enjoy learning even by playing so he wouldn’t find studying burdensome when he grows up. Let him appreciate the value of education at a young age. It is very rewarding when you see your child getting smarter as he grows up and much more when he is smarter than other kids you know…
6. Play with your child. Have fun together and let him realize that having fun is not just for kids but for all ages. The happy memories that you spend with your child will establish a sense of security for him and it will be the binding cord between you and your child as he grows up and starts to move farther away from you. It is most fulfilling when at your old age your child would still need you not for any other reason than the love you shared in his younger years.
7. Pray with your child. Whatever is your belief, teach your child to pray. Let him know that God is someone like you Who he can depend on. As your child grows up and wanders away from home, he may have trials in his life in which you cannot be with him or cannot do anything about it. It is of great help to know that there is one great force that could make all things work out in the end…