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Funny Things Kids Say 2

by yup tab

This is the second installment of my series Funny Things Kids Say. A collection of funny moments with the children in my life!

High Tech Food

My three-year-old daughter Madeleine was sitting in our breakfast nook located right off of our kitchen. We have a T.V. in there and she was watching one of her favorite cartoons. I was frying sausage in the kitchen. The sizzling of the sausage was a bit loud for her.

“Please turn the sound on the sausage down, ” she said matter-of-factly.

“I can’t hear my show.”

The Fashionista

My five-year-old niece Clarissa is a girly girl. She loves anything related to princesses and pink. She loves jewelry and getting her nails done. Most of all, she loves clothes. I didn’t realize how intense her clothes obsession had become until her mother (my sister) related the story of her latest temper tantrum. It was a bad one. Total breakdown. Clarissa had discovered that her cousins (my daughters) had been by her house for a visit with their aunt that day. Clarissa had been in school and had missed the visit. She started crying and stomping around. My sister tried to console her by telling her that her cousins would be by the next day to visit with her. That didn’t seem to phase Clarissa. The crying continued. Fifteen minutes later, she finally let my sister know why she was so upset.

Through tear-filled eyes she sobbed, “Please….just…tell…me! WHAT WERE THEY WEARING???? I didn’t get to see their clothes!!!!”

Future Donald Trump

When my five-year-old daughter Laurel lost her second tooth, she was really excited! She was well acquainted with tooth fairy protocol. She couldn’t wait for bedtime! As she was running up the stairs to slip her tooth under her pillow, she dropped it. Right into our thick shaggy white carpet. After several frustrating minutes of us searching for what amounted to a needle in a haystack, she began to look worried. I told her to go on to bed and that I would continue to look for it. As she reluctantly settled into bed, I ran downstairs quickly. She had lost her first tooth when we were visiting our in-laws a few weeks prior and I had stashed it in my purse. I had neglected to take it out of my purse when we returned home, so it was still in there. My plan was to substitute the first tooth for the missing second tooth. When I fished it out of my purse, though, I discovered that it had broken in two. I decided that I would tell a little harmless fib to explain the state of the tooth. I’d say that I’d found the tooth on the stairs and that one of us must have stepped on it and broken it. I knew she would be upset, but it was better than not providing any tooth at all! So, I showed her the tooth, told her my story, and braced for the worst. A smile immediately lit up her face!

Clearly sensing an opportunity she asked, ” Does this mean I get TWO coins from the Tooth Fairy since my tooth is in two pieces?”

For more laughs, please check out the first article in this series: Funny Things Kids Say

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