Twenty-one of my twenty-two Valentine’s Days have been single. As far as I can tell, this will be another one. What this means is that I have become something of an expert in celebrating what could be called an Anti-Valentine celebration. I mean, February fourteenth is a holiday, after all, and it doesn’t stop being one just because I don’t have a guy to celebrate it with. Folk like me have to do something to keep from sitting in our house all day thinking (or unsuccessfully trying not to think) about the fact that all over the country, there are other people having romantic dates and other such things, and I am sitting here reading, or watching a movie, or just eating dinner… alone.
So what are sad pathetic single people to do? In my experience, there are three categories of choices. First we have the ‘Bitterness’ category. Then there is the ‘Group Bitterness’ category. And the last is the ‘Covert Op’ category, which frankly, in my opinion, is the best, for a number of reasons.
But let’s start at the first; the Bitterness Category. I have two ways of celebrating for this category. The first is going to appeal more to those who love fire; go out and buy a bunch of the sickening pink and red items known to be sold in stores around this time of year. Valentine’s day cards, heart-shaped paper doilies, some stuffed animals, etc. Put them in a pile, and then burn them! Throw in some of those candy hearts, and experiment to see if you can get flames of a different color.
The second in the Bitterness Category involves sitting in front of a television and watching chick flicks. At least then you get a bit of romance, and for a little while can forget that you are all alone. It is not so outwardly bitter as the fire option, but the feeling it will leave in you will still border (at the least) on bitterness. Sleep well!
The next category is the Group Bitterness category. Hopefully this will take a group of single people who could be bitter, and turn them out at the end of the night happy. It’s really simple; you can have a girl party and a guy party. You get all your single friends together of the same sex, and watch movies, have a campfire, do make-overs, go hiking, go hunting, whatever you want to do. The key is to have a group of friends who can help each other to not feel lonely alone.
The next Group Bitterness option just might make a few single guys less single next Valentine’s Day, at which time he can have a Valentine celebration as opposed to an Anti-Valentine celebration. The reason is that this option will make the men look really good. It’s very simple (but perhaps not easy); have a dinner for your single female friends. Get a group of several guys, pick someone’s house or apartment, clean it, maybe decorate it with candles, and cook dinner. Some guys can cook, so find him amongst yourselves, and put him in charge. Invite several girls to come, and tell them to dress up. Buy each of them a yellow rose, make sure to set the tables for them and include the rose at their seats. And then serve them food. You can eat with them, or just act as servers for them. It’s up to you. And if you do it well enough, it should impress some of those single girls.
My very favorite Anti-Valentine Day Celebration, though, is the Covert Operation. There are a number of reasons for why it is most effective, and the best option. In order to pull it off, you have to go back in time to the days when you were a child, celebrating Valentine’s Day in elementary school and with your family.
Remember those days? Who was your Valentine? You were single, most likely. Yet still you managed to have fun. So while it may seem lame at first, the key from your childhood is that Valentine’s Day was a day to show love to those you cherished. Parents, siblings, friends. None of it was romantic.
So for the covert op anti-valentine day celebration, this is again who your target it; all of the non-romantic people you love. Or not all of them, just the most important.
This will still leaving you feeling lame, giving a card to your little sister. But this is where you have to get creative. I will tell you how my own mission went, and you can take ideas from that for your own.
I was in college, single, lonely, living thirty minutes away from my family. And I could feel the bitterness and other sad feelings coming upon me as February fourteenth approached. I decided I had no desire at all to be mopey on that day. So what to do?
I came up with a plan that left me feeling sneaky, that I had made others happy, creative, and adventurous. I picked my people to love, which was my family who lived thirty minutes away. I made them each a card, saying things in it to make them feel special. I then bought them candy, and stuffed animals for the sisters. And then I waited until two in the morning the night before Valentine’s Day. I drove home, parked a whole block away, snuck up to their car, dialed the key-pad code into the car, and left their goodies on their seats so they would find them when they went to school. I then drove back to campus and fell asleep, at three fifteen in the morning.
They were so confused the next morning, I heard! But the entire day I felt successful, sneaky, mischievous, and over-all, very good about myself. I did not feel pathetic at all. And that is the essence of an Anti-Valentine Day celebration; making the day good for your single self.
So those are a few suggestions. They take creativity. Hopefully they will make someone else happy as well. But most importantly, they should help to make you enjoy Valentine’s Day as you refuse to follow the rules by having a fun time even if you are single. It’s the greatest rebellion of all against this day.