This article is solely my opinion on how I have seen marriages fail in my lifetime. All marriages have problems and arguments. Everyone doesn’t act out the same. Some have problems that can be very damaging to a relationship. And some can mend their marriages just to have the distrust to reappear back into their relationships. I have chosen to concentrate on why married men and women want to cheat. Even still in this modern world it seems that men’s affairs are looked upon more lightly than a woman’s. I don’t have any true answers on how to fix it since everyone has their own way of thinking.
Very few married men will leave their wives for the other woman. She may be a stranger, a co-worker, a neighbor, or even your wife’s best friend. Most of the time when a marriage does break up over an affair it’s because the injured spouse finds out and chooses to leave the marriage. And if you do ever have an affair and regret it; telling the other spouse about it is not such a good idea. No matter how they find out the results are going to be the same. Someone gets hurt and distrust will set into the marriage. It will be the responsibility of the cheating spouse to rebuild that trust back into the marriage if they can. And don’t be surprised if ever argument you have it gets thrown back in your face.
Movies, television shows, and soap operas create a lot of drama and excitement into having affairs. They can jump from man to man, or woman to woman without thinking twice about it. This is not reality and usually doesn’t end happily ever after although T.V. wants us to think that way. Women are very often used as sex objects to entice men into thinking that there is always something better waiting for him out there in the forbidden world. Women get the idea that their knight in shining armor is out there to save them. Both men and women both cheat to recapture their youth; to see if they still have what it takes to be attracted to someone else. The middle age crisis is not just for men anymore. It happens to women just as often. Women do seem to think about cheating longer before actually committing the act. Of course this doesn’t make them any less guilty.
When men start feeling alone in a marriage they start living in a fantasy land of beautiful women and lots of sex. Some men just like the thrill of being attractive to another woman or having someone else attracted to him. If they aren’t getting enough sex at home they will more than likely seek it out somewhere else. When the responsibilities of being the perfect husband or doting father start getting them overwhelmed they can be easily convinced by another woman that they aren’t appreciated at home. There are women out there wives who will deliberately try to take your husband just to see if they can. Most of the time these kinds of women don’t plan on staying in relationships with married men. Once the damage is done the husband is left to deal with a broken hearted wife.
Men don’t like it when the newness of marriage wears off because they can’t deal with the changing that takes place as a relationship grows together. They don’t understand when the honeymoon period starts wearing off and the marriage gets into a more settled routine. Women are out into the working world as much as men are now. Children start coming along and women’s attention turns to fulfilling the children’s needs and the husband is left last on the list. Men start feeling that they are not needed or wanted and start feeling neglected. A pretty new neighbor moves in and starts giving him a little attention and then you have problems. They are getting their egos stroked and you are wondering where things went wrong.
Women have affairs just as easily as men. Usually this happens when they start feeling lonely or are left alone too much with nothing to do. They start wanting what they use to have in the beginning of their marriage. They want to rekindle the passion that was once there that made them feel sexy and desirable. In a abusive marriage if she finds out she can still be attractive to other men she will eventually get the courage to find out what it would be like to be in a another man’s arms. Basically what it mostly comes down to is husbands and wives stop communicating with each other, and forget how to show each other how much they mean to them. The result is getting what they think they need somewhere else.