President Barack Obama will soon be entering the Oval Office under a haze of uncertainty. The time has come for the Obama Administration to open up on the most important questions of our time. While problems remain in the Middle East, a recession is reported ad nauseam by the news media, and the threats of terrorist attacks continue to exist, it is the following questions that the administration needs to answer and answer now.
The first question the Barack Obama administration must answer now is what type of cigarettes does the president smoke? Marlboro, Camel, Winston, or something else? Does he smoke Marlboro’s and dream of riding a horse into the sunset? Does he smoke Camel’s due to the influence of Joe Camel? Is he a NASCAR fan who became hooked on Winston? We need to know the brand to determine what type of man is in office. Perhaps he smokes Sonoma’s like the frugal writer of this article. If so we may be able to look for financial responsibility in the White House. If he smokes Virginia Slims, then well, we might have a problem. Perhaps he even rolls his own. Now that would be something. You can just Obama sitting at his desk in the White House mulling over whether or not to invade Iran with his little cigarette machine.
And then there is the age old question, does he smoke menthol or non-menthol? Does he like that refreshing burst of menthol with his cancer sticks or rather just enjoy that all natural smoky flavor? Perhaps he smokes those new fangled Camel Crushes that allows the smoker to choose between menthol and non-menthol. For that matter, does he smoke Full Flavor, Lights, Ultra Lights or what? It would be difficult to imagine a tough negotiator and world leader lighting up an ultra light.
Does Barack Obama smoke King’s or some other size? While 100’s are more economical, they certainly aren’t cool. Again, it would be hard to take a president serious who smokes 100’s. Perhaps those nifty little Marlboro 72’s are Obama’s choice of smokes. That shorter length of the Marlboro 72 makes a great smoke for the busy executive lifestyle.
And what about Obama’s buddies? Has Obama ever shot a game of pool with Rev. Wright or Bill Ayers while they enjoyed a refreshing smoke together? Will he offer a cigarette to foreign leaders while hiding in the Rose Garden? We all know that many decisions are made in those dingy smoking areas outside of corporate offices, is that where he will meet foreign heads of states?
These are the questions that the Obama Administration must answer. We as a free people deserve these answers.