Every year local radio stations play the same boring Christmas songs over and over again, and hearing the Chipmunks one too many times can really kill your Christmas cheer (or make you want to kill yourself). So before you down a gallon of eggnog or a bottle of sleeping pills to drown out this agonizing holiday tradition of repetitive song play torture, consider making your own holiday mix tape with some of the best unique Christmas songs like these:
Merry Christmas (I don’t Want to Fight Tonight) by The Ramones
This is a great upbeat rockin’ Christmas song about keeping the peace during the holidays (and with all the stress this time of the year causes, couples definitely need to listen to this one).
Please, Daddy (Don’t Get Drunk This Christmas) by John Denver
It’s kind of ironic that John Denver would sing a song pleading with someone not to get drunk, but perhaps this song shows us where his love of booze originated. It’s kind of funny and really sad, but it’s a truthful Christmas song, at least.
Santa Claus and His Old Lady by Cheech and Chong
If you’re tired of reading ‘The Night Before Christmas’ every year, Cheech and Chong are here to offer a whole new kind of holiday story. It’s a hilarious song, if you can stand hearing the word “man” a hundred times.
Father Christmas by The Kinks
The Kinks were great at twisting songs in ways that were truly unique, and their take on Christmas is no different. In this song, they manage to give a song with pretty depressing lyrics an upbeat sound that makes it a lot of fun to listen to (while making a great point about poverty during the holidays).
Punk Rock Christmas by The Sex Pistols
The Sex Pistols weren’t afraid to drag the good name of anything through the mud, and Christmas was no exception. In the song, they explain how to have a proper punk rock Christmas by doing thinks like giving mum and dad safety pins for their cheeks; ripping Christmas sweaters to shreds; and changing Farrah Fawcett’s hairstyle for a day (who knew that her hair had so much to do with the holidays?)
Christmas in Hollis by Run DMC
If you’re planning on having a truly gangsta holiday, then you have to listen to this tune. It’s all about Christmas in Hollis Queens, complete with macaroni and cheese and collard greens. I just wish Santa was as generous as he is in the song.
Santa Claus Goes Straight to the Ghetto by Snoop Dogg
Perhaps even more gangsta then the song above, Snoop Dogg really knows how to celebrate the holidays: smokin’ and reminiscin’ about his Christmases as a child. He manages to throw in a few lines about those forgotten on Christmas, and his homeboy gives him some pretty interesting gifts.
Soulful Christmas by James Brown
James Brown also sang a great song titled ‘Santa Claus Goes Straight to the Ghetto’, as well as this really soulful Christmas song. You can tell the man put everything he had into each one of his songs, and this one is no exception. It’s a great Christmas thank you to all of his fans, and it’s the perfect tune for getting everyone moving at your Christmas party.
Christmas Card From a Hooker in Minneapolis by Tom Waits
There is just something absolutely mesmerizing about Tom Waits’ voice. It’s truly unique, just like this Christmas song. It’s a sad tune that gives you a glimpse into the life of someone who’ll be spending their Christmas in misery, and it’s definitely worth a listen.
Monster’s Holiday by Bobby “Boris” Pickett
This song is by the same spooky-voiced singer of ‘Monster Mash’. If you love the movie ‘Nightmare Before Christmas’ and weren’t ready for Halloween to end, you will really enjoy this fun song where classic Halloween monsters take over Christmas.
Pause of Mr. Claus by Arlo Guthrie
If you enjoy listening to Arlo Guthrie’s biggest hit, ‘Alice’s Restaurant’, every Thanksgiving, then maybe you should make listening to this tune a Christmas tradition. (It’s a lot shorter than ‘Alice’.) It’s a folksy tune dedicated to the FBI and ends with Arlo asking why the government doesn’t target Santa Claus, because he wears a red suit (communist!); smokes a pipe (hippie!); and has long hair and a beard (pacifist!). Arlo is a great storyteller, and he really knew how to sock it to authoritative figures.
Santa Claws is Coming to Town by Alice Cooper
For those who will be taking the “Christ” out of “Christmas” this year, there is this great song by Alice Cooper. He basically takes the tune ‘Santa Claus is Coming to Town’ and makes it very scary and very metal (meaning he makes it better!) So if you’ve been dreaming of a black Christmas, you’ve got to listen to this song.
Maybe this list of unique Christmas songs will cure your holiday radio blues, or maybe you’ll be angry that I’ve slightly decimated a religious holiday (at least that’s what its supposed to be) with most of these suggestions. If so, I say to you, “Bah, Humbug!” Go ahead and down that eggnog!