Everybody knows that there are some truly horrid Christmas gifts out there. The Clapper, Chia Pets, and The Salad Shooter quickly come to mind. But not all lousy gifts are as easy to spot as those three. This is especially true when it comes to grandma. How can you avoid the real stinkers this year and get grandma something she really wants? Here are five items that you should definitely avoid this year when buying for grandma.
5: Support hose. Sure, grandma may have spider veins or circulation problems, but she’s already aware of that. At Christmas we aren’t looking to be reminded of our problems or shortcomings, and that’s exactly what this gift would do. If your grandma felt she really wanted or needed support hose, she would probably get them herself.
4: Racy lingerie. Want to create a REALLY awkward moment this Christmas? Just wait until your grandma opens that peek-a-boo bra and thong combo. Some might think they’re being really funny by buying a gift like this. Rest assured that if you buy grandma something racy, the only person who will think it’s funny is YOU. If your grandma is actually asking for lingerie, go with a gift card to somewhere like Victoria’s Secret. That way, you give her what she wants while also being discreet.
3: A cleaning utensil. Mops and vacuums are great, but not very exciting as Christmas presents. Your grandma knows how to clean her house and what items she needs to do the job. The only exception for a gift like this is something robotic like the Roomba vacuum that does the job for her.
2: A new pet. Perhaps your grandma lives alone and you think this will be a great way for her to feel less lonely. The thing is, pets require a lot of work and care. I doubt grandma relishes the idea of cleaning up poop or watching Rover make off with the evening’s dinner when she’s not looking. Before you buy that new puppy, just imagine grandma being awoken at three in morning by Fido barking his head off to warn her of a suspicious cricket chirping outside.
1: Life insurance. I’m not talking about setting up a life insurance policy for grandma that designates a charity as the beneficiary of any wealth should she meet her demise. That can actually be quite a thoughtful gift and allow grandma the comfort of knowing that her passing will benefit a cause that is important to her. I am talking about buying grandma a life insurance policy that names YOU as the beneficiary. If you are actually planning this, you need help. RUN to your nearest church and plead to God for mercy for actually considering giving this ‘gift’.
If you avoid giving grandma these five Christmas gifts, rest assured that you will make her Christmas one that she won’t regret. Make the mistake of getting her one, though, and you may be disowned.