Who wouldn’t want to marry the “man of her dreams?” Surely, you would want to. But oftentimes, this does not happen as the “man of your dreams” is based on a character who is perfect in every way. You shape him based on your perception of what is ideal and of what makes up a good husband.
These unrealistic expectations; however, would lead to frustration and heartache as you would eventually come to realize that no one is perfect. You end up marrying -not the “man of your dreams” – but someone else who would come nearest to the mark that you have set.
Take the case of Elisa. She had a dream that one day her knight in shining armor would come and whisk her away from the humdrum of daily life.
In her mind her dream man was tall, dark and handsome; a man who has a good sense of humor; who could outwit anyone in debates and who would be sweet and thoughtful. This was a pretty perfect picture; Indeed, someone came along, he was tall dark and handsome, had an IQ above average, but sadly, he had no sense of humor.
Elisa decided he did not meet her criteria so she moved on and went on looking for her dream man. Days passed, months and then years and Elisa met men, who in one way or another met some of her criteria, but there was always something that each of them lack. In the end, she remained alone and lonely for no one had come close to meeting the stringent measurement she had set.
Amanda on the other hand, had only three criteria in her mind, that the man of her dreams loved her in return and that he should be kind and true.
She was able to marry the man of her dreams and even much more. Her husband loved her to death, was kind and gentle and stayed true to their marriage vows. Not only that, she discovered that her man had a great sense of humor and was intelligent and generous.
What do these two cases tell us? That the criteria you set for your dream man should be based on reality; the reality that no one is perfect. How could you expect someone perfect when you, yourself are not perfect?
Oftentimes they call him a “dream man” precisely, because he could only be a reality in a woman’s dream, the elusive perfect man that every woman wished she could marry. And when you have a list of the criteria in your hands and go through life based on those criteria of your dream man, almost always, you would end up frustrated.
This is because men are not “made to order” creations. Each man is unique in his own way and you have to set your standards based on this stark reality. If you set your criteria within this truth then you will end up marrying your dream man.
Love should only be the major basis of marrying a man; and not because of some impossible “dream man” criteria that you have set for yourself. Loving someone makes him your dream man and therefore, you’ll end up marrying the man of your dreams.
